Thursday, January 24, 2013

Are women and girls important?


In honor of the rape victims around the world, especially two young women in India, I would like to introduce my first guest blog from a colleague, a friend—Dr. Addie Ellis. She is a very energetic, charm, encouraged and compassionate individual.  Her passion is making differences for those around her especially the children, the youth and the unseen. Here is the condensed of her biography.

Dr. Addie L. Ellis
Personal Growth Coach
EdD, Drexel University
MS, National University
BA, UC Riverside

Dr. Ellis is a Personal Growth Coach specializing in assisting women in accessing and achieving their goals. With over 15 years as a personal growth coach, counselor, and educator, Dr. Ellis has guided small business leaders, executives, non-profit developers, mid-level managers, and educators. Her workshops include: “Moving from Surviving to Thriving,” “Discovering Your Passion,” “Purpose, Passion, Power,” “My Sister’s Keeper,” “Unheard and Unseen: Educating the New Face of Homelessness,” “Identifying Behaviors that Maximize Outcomes.”

In addition to coaching and speaking engagements, Dr. Ellis is a consultant, and she is also a professor at St. Mary’s College of California where she teaches the Psychology of Gender and Systems Collaboration and Consultation.

A long-time advocate for children and youth, Dr. Ellis serves as Secretary of the Board for Capitol Collegiate Academy, a charter school operated on the firm belief that all students, regardless of race and socioeconomic status are entitled to a high quality education. She is also a regular volunteer at Mustard Seed School: An emergency school for children experiencing homelessness.

Dr. Ellis completed her Doctor of Education in Educational Leadership and Management with a policy concentration from Drexel University, December 2012. She holds credentials in Life and Executive Coaching, Pupil Personnel Services, and Administration.

Dr. Ellis is the proud mother of her sailor, Naseer Najee. She lives and coaches by the quote, “It is never too late to be what you might have been.”




Are women and girls important?

On January 3, 2013, a young Indian woman died in Singapore from the wounds inflicted by a brutal rape the occurred in New Delhi, India.  Her crime was to be a woman, on a bus, with men.  In the United States tongues were clicked… “Isn’t it a shame what women have to go through in those countries?”  “They have no respect for women!”  “Something must be done…in those countries.”  As tongues clicked and fingers wagged about the brutality women face in other countries, on August 11, 2012 a 16 year old young girl was brutally raped, videoed, and photographed by several male assailants in Steubenville, Ohio, USA.   On the video recording the young men laughed at their ability to repeatedly victimize this young woman.  What links these cases; young girls whose only crime was their gender. 

Women and girls are brutalized world-wide based on the social construct of gender.  Within many cultures women and girls are viewed as being the “weaker sex.”  As the “weaker sex” some believe they are in need of the protection of men.  Women and girls who act outside of cultural norms; those who are not fully covered, who advocate for themselves and others, who seek male dominated positions or education,  are viewed as “deserving of victimization.”  Malala Yousufzai and Kainat Ahmad are prime examples of gender expectations leading to victimization.  These two young women were shot by the Pakistani Taliban for attempting to go to school.  World-wide women and girls are more likely to:  not attend school, be victimized by a male, and live in poverty (www.unesco.org, 2012). 

Are women and girls in need of the protection of men or the protection from men?  In western culture young age girls are taught to be demure; yet alluring, intelligent; yet conniving.  This dichotomy is played out in every Disney cartoon.   The message given to young girls is “your strength and value rests with the male.”  The message given to young boys is “you control the destiny of the girl.”  Neither message is beneficial.  These messages continue into adolescents where young women and young men are bombarded with images of women as objects to be used by men.  These images can be seen in popular music videos, commercials, and sitcoms.  Shockingly these images can also be viewed on morning “news” shows where the young woman sits prettily with a low cut top and short skirt next to her fully clothed, older male co-host.   The messages do harm to both girls and boys as it perpetuates the myth that “boys will be boys” and girls are without control or value. 

In the Steubenville, Ohio, USA rape case some of the boys stated “she wanted it.” “She slept around.” “She was a s___.”  In the New Delhi, India case some remarked, “Why was she out so late?”  “She should have been home.”  “She was a loose woman.”  Fortunately these comments were in the minority; however, they still occur.  If we are ever to move beyond the victimization and second class treatment of women and girls we must start with teaching our boys that girls matter for who they are, not for what they can do for the male.  At the same time, we must teach our girls that they are valuable and deserving for whom they are, not for what they can do for the male.  When we as a society are able to teach our children that each gender is valuable and important, then we will be on our way to making the world safe for all.  

Tuesday, January 22, 2013

LOVING AND MISSING YOU



LOVING AND MISSING YOU
In honor of my brother, Vinh Ky (1978-2013)


The solitary sound of rain
Escaped the perfume of the land
In a deep solitary soul
Pity, a young leaf just fell though

You went into the eternity
Like the water comes back to its source
In a bright moon night
A sigh of breath is all

Vinh Ky, oh my beloved brother
Your essence filled the entitled space
Flower, the heavenly music just sang
For a life of worth remembered

Our life is as long as a breath
And you slept forever
You went to the Pure Land
Between illusory and immense

Vinh Ky, oh my beloved brother
I will forever missing you!

Sacramento, January 5th, 2013.

Friday, January 18, 2013

President Obama’s Inauguration


                                                                       From Washington Post - photo by   (Mark Wilson/Getty Images)
In honor of President Obama's Second Inauguration, I would like to post an old poem that I wrote four years ago.


President Obama’s Inauguration

Today is the 20th of January, 2009
One day after Martin Luther King Jr.’s day
44 years after Blacks and women got the right to vote
Barack Hussein Obama, born August 4th, 1961, becomes the 44th President and
The first African American President of the United States of America
Today is a chilly, yet sunny day in Washington, D.C.
It is beautiful in California and it is a new day for all people.
It is a renewal of American spirit
It’s a gigantic and majestic event
A hundred million people in the USA and around the world watching
With around two million people at the Presidential Inaugural experiencing
There is an ocean of people stretching as far as our eyes can see
Greeting an extraordinary leader,
Who has a willingness, openness, and eagerness to lead our country out of the great mess.
It is such an exciting and historic moment
With so much pride,
A tsunami of hope and expectations
He is a symbol of dreams and people’s motivations
At the inauguration, he called for unity and responsibility of all people.
And he restated that the USA is ready to lead the world for the betterment of all.
With that, the new spirit is on
The beginning of a new chapter
Of our history.


Mira Loma High
Inauguration Day, 2009

Monday, January 14, 2013

TRONG TA



                          Chờ nhau - Monterey, CA - Photo BXK
TRONG TA
            Thân tặng anh chị Thu Tỵ
Chờ em sao chưa đến
Để anh buồn ngẩn ngơ
Anh vớ vẩn làm thơ
Cho thời gian khép lại

Mà sao không tự tại
Lại cứ nghĩ về em
Tình yêu có êm đềm
Khi lệ thuộc người khác

Từ cảm giác mộc mạc
Đến mơ tưởng tương lai
…Chúng mình không là hai
Tuy hai nhưng mà một

Em ơi mai và mốt
Ta về chùa học kinh
Để tìm thấy chúng mình
Pháp Hoa Kinh muôn thuở.

Sacarmento, CA. September 2010.

Thursday, January 10, 2013

Thơ Haiku Tình Lam - Xuân Hạ Thu Đông


                                                      Beautiful laughs of GDPT Kim Quang

Thơ Haiku Tình Lam - Xuân Hạ Thu Đông

hoa Lam vừa nở
nuôi dưỡng từ tâm
hương lam muôn thuở

nắng mai khoe sắc
lặng lẽ hư không
tình thương trong mắt

tiếng lá xôn xao
vàng khoe mặt đất
yêu nhau thuở nào

tuyết phủ kín rào
trăng xanh đang đợi
tình Lam lao xao.

Jan. 11th, 2010.

Sunday, January 6, 2013

THƯƠNG NHỚ EM

                                                                       Thư pháp Võ Việt Tuấn

THƯƠNG NHỚ EM

tiếng mưa rơi tịch mịch
hương của đất nhẹ lay
lắng sâu hồn cô tịch
ngậm ngùi lá vèo bay

Em đi về bên đó
như nước chảy về nguồn
vằng vặc đêm trăng tỏ
một hơi thở nhẹ buông

Vĩnh Kỳ em yêu dấu
hương nào quyện không gian
hoa nhạc trời đang tấu
cho một kiếp lỡ làng

đời dài như hơi thở
Em ngủ một giấc nồng
Em đi vào cõi tịnh
giữa hảo huyền mênh mông

Vĩnh Kỳ em yêu dấu
anh mãi nhớ về em!

Sacramento January 5th, 2013.

Saturday, January 5, 2013

Experiencing the 3rd gate in my life – LIKE A BAD HANGOVER

                                          My first "sick/drunk" experience - Photo Herman C.

For Vietnamese version, click here - Đọc tiếng Việt ở đây:

Experiencing the 3rd gate in my life  – 
LIKE A BAD HANGOVER

Today, like any other day, is a beautiful day
This early morning, there is low flying fog
Then, the mellow sun warms the gentle space
My beautiful wife took me to the hospital for an Esophagogastroduodenoscopy (EGD).
This is a medical procedure to see if the intestine has an ulcer or not
This is my first time to experience such a procedure, even though previously
I have witnessed what my parents went through.
Perhaps, this was another sign of me getting old.
What I fear most is the needle and withdrawing my blood, but now I have to face it
Herman Chan, a nurse took care of me and put the IV needle into my flesh.
Mindful breathing—taking deep and powerful breaths in and out—is the method I've used in every situation
And it was also effective in this case.
The IV needle was in the skin, and I felt the rushing of the Sodium chloride solution
My right arm started to pangolin (a burning sensation) and warmed up the skin.
I almost felt the loudness and quietness of the ocean waves.
Then I lay there relaxing, waiting for the endoscopy
In the operational room, two more nurses greeted me,
including a male Vietnamese nurse, named Lan Cao and a female Filipino nurse.
Dr. Yasser Al-Antably gave me an anesthesia (sedatives medication) and I started to feel drunk
I just remembered that they put something in the mouth to prevent my mouth closing and perhaps they put the "camera/endoscope" into it ... and I fell asleep...
I remembered the great Vietnamese poet Nguyen Du has taught us:
"When, late at night, wine fumes had all cleared off,
One’d start from sleep to sorrow for oneself.”
Being drunk can be suffering for you and for others, not only to torment each other.
So, moving forward
Do not over drink or get wasted.
Once at home, waking up, I still felt drunk.... no one in sight...
Except for my gentle and loving mom, who was sitting quietly near my bed with her worried eyes
In that "drunk" process, I remember vaguely how I got home and how long I slept
I only know that my brother-in-law, Le Minh Tue, drove me home
because they previously refused my admission without a driver.
Whatever happened in the process tarnished progression,
I don’t remember clearly.
No wonder the doctor told me not to drive or drink alcohol for another 24 hours.
Thus, the moral is DO NOT drink and drive since you have no control over you whatsoever.
The dawn
The loved ones around you
the chill wind or an old hill
and all things considered
or all existence - is simply beautiful.
For the first time on the sick bed, it is as if I experienced an old aging phenomenon.
Thus, life is fragile
and has many hurdles,
We will overcome its hardship with serene, mindful and optimistic attitude.

Sacramento, December 29th, 2012.